You know the reason why you’ve been through a lot of relationships that didn’t work?

Friendship, dating and even marriage are relationships that are destiny sensitive.

It means that, you don’t go into any of them just for the sake of it alone or for the fun of it. Decisions made around them must be destiny inspired because they affect your destiny.

You might not want to believe that once you call a person a friend the person (at a conscious and unconscious level) has influence on your life and destiny. This friendship could be the normal friendship, dating, what we call relationship and marriage.

Destiny is not fixed. Destiny is what you make of your life and living. It is self determinant and it is being shaped by your decisions on a daily basis.

Unfortunately, many people just become friends with people without even thinking about it. Some even go as far as dating without thinking through their decisions. The frustrations, depression, infidelity and infirtility in marriage are the result of such “unthinking” decisions.

Deep within all of us, we desire to be with our better half such that it has pushed us into testing and testing until the desire for the main thing is gradually dwindling down to detest.

Imagine starting to date from 16, and at 22 you have dated more than 10 guys and have had uncountable sex that you always hate yourself when you think about it. The reason is…

First thing must come first. You don’t place the cart before the horse. The horse must be the one to carry the cart along that’s why it must come first.

What am I saying?
Purpose comes before relationship.

Haven’t you heard that you start existing the moment you were born and you only start living once you discover the reason you were born?

So, every relationship you go into before you discover your purpose is relationship with the wrong person. The person is not only the wrong person. You too are the wrong person for the relationship because you’ve not started living.

Your life will keep unfolding until you discover who you are, and everybody that comes into your life will be meeting an evolving specie. Until full growth is attained when purpose is discovered and expressed you will be changing in character, likes, dislikes, attitude, disposition, etc.

Imagine someone loving you because you like music, only for the person to come into your life and in five months you’re into another thing altogether!

So, it’s very important to know why you were born and what your life was made for. You must be disciplined enough to be patient with yourself as you go through this discovery phase of your life to avoid making mistakes you’ll forever regret.

Happiness, wealth and love are not meant to be pursued. The creator isn’t insensitive as to create you and expect you to figure the most important ‘needs’ of your life by yourself. No wonder, Jesus in Matthew 6:24 “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?”

He went further to give examples of how God feeds the birds and clothe the grass of the field which we kill on a daily basis. If God provides the necessities of life for them how much more humans that are created in God’s image?

There is a problem. The problem is misplaced priorities. We don’t put first thing first. That’s why we pursue happiness, love, and wealth and not still have them.

What’s the first thing?
It’s the Kingdom of God as contained in Matthew 6:33.
“The Kingdom of God” is simply what your life was designed for and predetermined by heaven which is your purpose in life. Once you discover that, every other thing will come to you effortlessly.

You mean just like that?
I don’t believe it!
Hell yes!

How do you discover that purpose?
It’s in what your heart beats for and what you have natural abilities to do. Essentially, it is in the problems you can solve in society that you have passion for. (Read that carefully again)

Once you discover that purpose and start expressing it, the first thing you’ll notice is the deep sense of fulfillment and serene joy and peace that brings happiness.

Then, you’d discover you are solving problems and creating values, and really, money goes along with value… Money will start coming in, and soon enough, the right person will love you for who God has created you to be – the real you. And that person will stay and be patient with you throughout your process, faithful until marriage.

How will the person know?
Just like John the Baptist leaped in the womb of his mother as she saluted Mary carrying Jesus in the womb, People whose assignment links together will notice a deep connection and peace. And the first test is that the person will be willing to wait for the right time for sex, and you will be so comfortable and at peace around him/her.

In summary,
This world is grossly out of course because young people have misplaced priorities. We see street children who turned into robbers because they were born out of wedlock or poverty. We see abuse, nudity and sexual perversion resulting to depression, suicide, rape, killing and death because young people have ignorantly refused to be disciplined.

It’s a call for you to do the right thing because not many people are doing it and because they need your example to be convinced of a better way of life.

The one decision you make towards the right thing will save a lot of lives.

Solve problems,
Pursue your passion to make life better for people,
Live your purpose,

And all you seek will come to you.

Have a beautiful life

– Dunamis Shiloh Okonwor

Leave a Comment